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Lights Out

October 20, 2009 - Michael Palmer
So I am heading back to the office from volleyball sectionals and I see the old red and blue flashing lights behind me.

So I get pulled over and wonder what the problem is? Well it seems the taillights have quit working.

Turn signals - Check. Brake lights - Check.

Headlights - Check.

Taillights - nope.

It was the Martins Ferry Police and I was thankful that they did not want to give me a ticket and followed me the remainder of the way back to the office.

It was a fuse that had blown and I replaced it, but pop, it went out again. The culprit was a front marker light that had been damaged the previous evening by a flying deer. Yes, I said a FLYING deer.

I was driving home on US 250 and of course, it is Deer Alley. The little spawn of Bambi are dining on their foliage all along the length of the highway. Ambling with total disregard for the oncoming traffic, back and forth from one side of the road to the other.

I was driving through a light fog and had slowed to 45 mph with a semi tractor-trailer approaching in the East bound lane. Then I noticed the headlights of the truck blink, left then right and suddenly from out of the brightness it appeared.

Bambi, spinning in mid-air and heading right for me. The anti-lock brakes start chattering and then it happened, touchdown of the airborne venison into the sheet metal of my hood and right front fender.

I pulled off onto the side of the road and checked the damage. The lights are still burning! Excellent! The right headlight is burning bright but is pointed down directly in front of the car on the pavement and the turn signal is glowing orange but dangling in the breeze.

I pop the trunk, get my trusty roll of all-purpose universal automotive repair material (duct tape), and make the necessary reattachment to make it home.

Evidently, the light had shorted out and the fuse had burnt but it went unnoticed. I did have a motorist stop and let me know that they were not working in the short space between the cruiser peeling off and making the office parking lot. That was very nice of them.

Overall, it was a very good outcome to what could have been a major disaster. We have no spare car, so if the green clunker bites the dust, I may have to get a horse to ride to work. There is not a carpool that goes my way. Especially now, with tournaments and the finals weeks of football, there is a lot of excitement going on and I would hate to miss any of it because I did not have wheels.


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